Posted by
2spothipshot on Monday, October 09, 2006 9:04:00 AM
Today at the u.n.
The security council flipped a coin to see if they should flip a coin to see if they should start a discussion on whether or not to form a committee to study the potential affects on the psyche of the possibly deranged "hand grenade with a bad haircut" leader of North Korea (Should they -the u.n.- actually ask the little poorly groomed, personal explosive device to reconsider moving toward the total annihilation of every living organism within striking distance -to the south & east of him that is- of his, mysteriously covered in chinese patents pending. "Takee-Home-KungPao-Whoopass" missiles.) as it pertains to section 3, amendment 2, paragraph 13L of the Geneva Conventions regarding Prenegotiation Stress Disorder, wherein and heretofore it doth state: "The forces of liberty (see capitalism) are just a bunch of mean, insensitive freedom lovers who probably excelled in sports or auto repair or some other such gauche activity and always adhere to things like facts, rules, rational thought and the basic belief that I didn't bowl a perfect 300 the first 6 games I ever played."
Condeleezza Rice said, "I feel good that we have established the basis for a potential dialogue here." Then she took some "aspirin" and lied down for a real long time. Ambassador Bolton said, "The button ! Just let me push the freakin' button !!!" The U.S. Supreme Court said, "Hey, who made us the boss of him anyway ? We have nukes too ya know and we're no better than they are as a culture. They're just different." The U.S. Military said nothing but the sun over Pyongyang was eclipsed later in the day as an unknown quantity of aircraft ranging from a few hundred fully loaded B-52s to a just recommissioned 1944 Pipper Cub whose VFW charter member pilot, one Buzz Halfcocked, was heard to mutter, " I'm takin' me out some commy pinko trash !" , just as he fired his Colt 45 service pistol out the side of the Cub with the missing door and in the general direction of "commy pinko" central.
Throughout the world, numerous thug leaders and mass murderers made on themselves, melted into the general public and immediately began putting "Plan 2-b" into action. That plan involves crossing the porous southwestern American border where they will have more rights as illegals and can then begin the campaign to vote out those nasty republicans and reinstall the Clintons to power so as to relive the glory days of free flowing nuke secrets/materials and, look the other way, U.S. diplomacy.
All of this while the latest john zogby "How much does George Bush suck?" poll revealed that some percentage of Americans have heard of North Korea and are aware that john kerry and "Trapper John" ended the horrible suffering there with their brave testimony before congress at the McCarthy hearings. The poll participants were also informed, uh, were in agreement that F.D.R. freed the slaves and gave native Americans their own nation of Cleav-a-land. Also, 93 percent said that ALL or most republicans are homosexual creepy perverts with 100 percent agreeing, "not that there's anything wrong with that."
In a related story, "Jackass the Movie #2" is #1